My fabulous photographer gal pal Suzy Goodrick Photography recently asked me to write for her Engaged Girl blog series and I found myself laughing out loud as I wrote this. I am glad I could take the time to really reflect on that season in our lives 2 years ago, and see how amazing God was in bringing us together to do this crazy wild adventure, hand in hand!
I Love You, James VanderWeide!
ENGAGED GIRL: WHAT REALLY MATTERS
In June of 2013, just three days after James and I were engaged, I lost my job. So suddenly, I went from being blissfully happy behind stacks of bridal magazines, to a computer screen split between two sites: Indeed and The Knot.
So not ideal.
Here’s what I am about to tell you, and don’t freak out. Do not be surprised if everything you imagined is completely different than you had planned for your wedding…it could actually turn out to be better.
For instance…
I said these words before dress shopping: “I will not get an off-white, mermaid style, strapless dress with feathers.”
So naturally, I got an off-white, mermaid style, strapless dress with feathers.
Then I said these words about the venue: “I want us to be married in the old historic church downtown.”
But the old historic church downtown wouldn’t fit our reception size, so we ended up at the next venue we visited. Oh my. You Tuscan dream villa. You had me at chandelier.
You have your ideas of what you imagine and then, things change. And it’s okay! BREATHE.
Because as you can see, we decided the show must go on and we began planning our wedding several months out, hoping that would give me time to find a job and plan the wedding, set for the end of March.
Instead, I found an amazing job opportunity in Texas that needed me to move from our home of Arizona by the end of September.
REALLY?
The venue was already booked and the dress was ordered. The Tuscan dream venue and the perfect dress with lace with feathers! The feathers!
We had a few options, either I would move out to Texas by myself and work until March and fly back for our wedding or we would have to bump the wedding date up. James and I decided we had no desire to have a long distance engagement so we made some calls to see if our date could be changed so soon.
It turned out that our venue was happy because they happened to have a Sunday available with reduced rates because we wanted an early afternoon wedding. Basically, we would be saving a substantial amount of money by changing our date! We thought we wanted a Saturday, but did it matter? We were learning to be flexible for the sake of our life.
The wedding needed to work around our life and not the other way around.
When I called the wedding dress store, the owner initially laughed at me. “Your dress is in Spain and won’t be here until January. Not gonna happen.”
I urged her to at least ask and she promised to make a call and get back to me. When she did get back to me, here’s what she said:
“I do not understand how this is happening but your dress will be here in 2 weeks. Girl, this is crazy. It must be meant to be.”
So, that was it. My mom drove up to Phoenix and we literally spent one weekend doing what most brides do for months. We ordered the tuxes, flowers, cake and invitations in just 2 days.
Because James and I decided to embrace the crazy adventure. And our hearts were settled and centered by this truth:
As long as the wedding licenses are signed on November 3rd, nothing else matters.
We compromised with my job in Texas and I moved out there by myself for a month to start my job and find us a place to live, and flew back for my bridal shower and my wedding. It was a wild ride!
And you know what? Adjusting everything and moving 3 days after our wedding? We wouldn’t change a thing. It was exciting. So many new things to look forward to, even in the midst of the unknown. We ended up having our dream wedding and all of the adrenaline forced us to make decisions rather than linger on Pinterest trying to decide between 8 different themes. It encouraged me to trust my gut. I had the wedding I always wanted, to the man I always hoped to share my life with.
Remember how I said no matter what happened that day, we would be fine as long as we got married? Well, here’s what really went down…
- I got a bloody nose 5 minutes before walking down the aisle. AND, I almost forgot to walk down the aisle with my bouquet because of the chaos of said bloody nose.
- My maid of honor stepped on my dress and it ripped. I laughed. I can’t make this stuff up.
- I forgot to put on my garter. The DJ had to distract the crowd and my bridal gals had to run and get it, put it on, only for James to take it off!
- The shimmer gold pen was leaky and made a hot mess of our gorgeous photo guest book. We will forever have faces like Edward from Twilight. Sparkly.
- Our wedding videographer was, um, new at his craft, and videotaped the entire ceremony from my neck up. No sight of the most expensive dress I have ever owned. And I look naked. I laughed and cried simultaneously when I first saw it. I hope our future children enjoy a good giggle.
But hallelujah, the papers were signed on November 3rd. We are married!
And that’s all that matters.